well damn, i’m frustrated

So it’s been a while! Two months of ‘while’. Here’s what’s happened in between:

– I did, in fact, complete the week of Paleo breakfasts challenge. Hooray!
– I even sustained it for I think another week after that. Hooray!
– Then life got tough/the holidays rolled around/life, oh wow, LIFE and I stopped the challenge and stopped monitoring my calories and basically just let myself go for a while. Booooo.
– I asked for (and received) a FitBit Flex for Christmas. Yay!
– I got back on the weight loss wagon, started tracking again
– I started eating my lunch at my desk and walking 3+ miles each day during my lunch, plus miles on the weekend with R

Here’s where I got serious. As of the 1st of the year, I decided to give melatonin another shot. And this time, I found the right dose – 2 mg a night (in 1 mg pills) taken an hour before bed has me totally ready to sleep by the time I should be. I was still getting anxiety about sleeping each night, so to address that, I’ve been measuring out 2 glasses of wine each night and accounting for them in my calories.

Well, I’ve been tracking for almost three weeks with this technique. Here’s the problem.

weight

First of all, obviously weighing almost every day means that I’ll see the day to day fluxuations. But for the life of me, I can’t remember whether the 150 at the first day was something I was guessing before I set up my scale, or if I actually stepped on the scale for the first time and weighed 150. I’m leaning towards that being the case (which means then i’ve lost 4.4 pounds in 3 weeks – whoo!) but maybe I’m deluding myself to make myself feel better about eating less, drinking less, moving more, and losing literally no weight.

For me, who is finally giving this a solid shot including establishing an entirely new bedtime routine for myself to meet my goals and manage my stress levels, the chance that I’ve made no progress is very discouraging.

That being said, the only way to find out if it’s working is to keep doing it and see what happens. 4.4 pounds in 3 weeks would be super great if it were true, so I guess I will continue trucking on despite my frustration.

I’m also thinking about bringing back the daily eats – another goal of mine is to manage our food budget more wisely, so I’m planning on a lot more home-made food making its way to work. Later all!

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